Parenting is a tricky art to master and granted I have made a fair few mistakes in my journey so far.
Given that it is New Year, I have taken the time to reflect over the last year and see if I can learn any lessons from the whopping mistakes that I have made.
And it seems that I can.
So, behold, here are my New Year's Resolutions for 2016!
1. I will learn how to cook fishfingers.
2. And toast
3. I will train my toddler to keep his buttocks off the Laura Ashley wall paper.
4. I will NOT fall victim to the powers of advertising and I simply will not continue to fund my child's minion addiction.
5. I will not leave my child unattended with a tub of Sudocrem.
6. Or paint.
7. I will teach my child the concept of 'tidy-up time'.
8. I will email the tooth fairy to remind her to come so that I don't have to cover for her useless ass by writing letters like these to my son on her behalf.
9. I will not attempt to brush my child's curly hair when it is dry.
10. Or my own.
11. I will leave haircuts to the professionals and will not attempt to do them myself and leave my child looking dumb...or dumber.
12. I will continue to toilet train my husband. One day he will understand what needs to happen.
I promise you this much.
13. I will keep on top of the laundry pile... not literally on top of it...
14. ...so that my husband doesn't have to walk around looking like this.
15. Despite being mildly competitive, I will try my very best to let others win. I don't have to win every damn time.
I will give others a fighting chance.
16. I will learn how to park properly.
In truth, it has never been my strength.
17. And finally, I will not leave my fruit bowl unattended when my 43 year old brother is visiting.
HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!!
Thanks for all of your lush support this year!! I hope you all get wonderfully mullered tonight!!
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